Today’s Topic(which was supposed to be last night’s): Friends with benefits

Hi All and welcome back to Nikki’s corner. My apologies for not posting last night, but a girl’s got to look her best. I got my hair did. Anyhoo, this topic introduced itself during The friend you wanna F&^K topic. Now this friends with benefits issue.

OK People. Why would you put yourself through this?  Now I’m gonna cover this somewhat fairly cause I seen a documentary on this ( yea right). MTV actually did a true life episode called friends with benefits. It was definitely what I expected.

Friends with benefits can work IF IF (please notice if is bolded) both people are able to keep their feelings separate.  Meaning you 2 see each other, you can be chill, you can have sex with each other  and your friendship is still intact.  This is the perfect premise for the friends with benefits. Problem, it almost seems inevitable that someone will catch feelings. ( Yea I said it)

Unfortunately, someone always manages to get hurt in these situtations and it is really sad because it falls right into the the other topic which spawned this one. Unless both people are willing to take the friend relationship and turn it into a romantic one, don’t even bother. Now I know some people out there will say, well I keep my feelings in check. Well whoopidy doo for you. Are you positive the person that you are screwing is keeping theirs in check as well. People love to tell you one thing and do a different thing when they are alone.

You may wanna check for signs  if this ” friends with benefits” ish may not be working.

1) Your “friend” now seems overly needy

2) Your “friend” gets jealous when you date other people.

3) You may say something about your”friend” that in a normal friendship would be laughed off but instead has caused your”friend” to sulk and be angry.

4) You notice your “friend” is alot angrier these days.

5) Comparison conversations of who you are dating vs them will  ineveitably arise.

For those of you in healthy (snicker) Friends with benefits relationship, I say congrats. You are the few, the proud, the unattached emotionally.

For the rest of your needy ones or soon to be attached ones, don’t bother with this relationship. It wont be fulfilling and you will be more hurt in the end.

That’s it for now.

Smooches

Nikki  

~ by N on March 7, 2008.